I'm in a funk

I'm not sure what's up with me, but I'm in a funk.  Like not full depression, but not entirely happy.  I mean, I'm not unhappy, but I'm not cheerful like normal?  Does any of this make sense?  I've felt like this for about two weeks now.  Just in a weird space so to speak. 

I noticed that I went full on funk a few weeks ago after Emanuel and I had a fight about wedding stuff.  WHY is the engagement and wedding planning the hardest part?  I felt the same way the first time around too.  The engagement/planning period was the hardest time.  Our fight?  Something silly about the timing of stuff.  I think he's closed minded.  He thinks I'm not putting enough priority on certain vendors.  In the end, neither of us is right or wrong.  We are just different people with different priorities.   However, in this argument, something in me sorta freaked out.  Maybe it shorted out? 

I've been different since.  I can't quite figure it out.  I just know that since this fight (at least I think that was the start of my funk) I've been bummed in some sort of way.  I've experienced depression and actually been on meds more than once in my life, so I'm pretty sure this isn't the problem.  It sure has some similar things though.....like I'm tired all the time.  I just can't get enough sleep.  I'm tired at night, but sometimes can't fall right to sleep.  I sleep pretty well during the night, but wake up dragging. 

I've lost some commitment to my diet and find myself "cheating" more and more regularly.  I'm just not ME.  Now, part of it could truly be that I cheated on keto and now as my body tries to get back into the swing of things that I am experiencing that "keto flu".  It's a real thing where you just feel fatigued and have similar symptoms to the flu.  So maybe that's my problem?

Needless to say, I'm in a place that I'm not thrilled to be in.  I want to be my normal happy-go-lucky self.  I want to have my energy back.  I want to not feel this way. 

What to do?  I'm not sure yet.  I DO know that exercise would probably help pretty much ALL my symptoms.  However, I'm not motivated to exercise.  HA  That said, I know I still need to do it.  It would help my unsettled feeling I think.  Also, committing to my diet again would help me.  I had energy and really felt good about how my body was changing.  Plus, it is foods I love!  These two things would make a huge difference.  I guess I just need to dig deep and just do it! 

Nothing will change if I don't make it happen. 


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